Sober Toolbox 14: Brain Box

Picture Credit: Ashin K Suresh @ashin_k_suresh

Hello Sobertown,

You are who you choose to be. Perceptions of who we are, what we are, how we present to the world and most importantly, how we present to ourselves is SUBJECTIVE and malleable. How we perceive ourselves can also dictate our direction, success and growth.

Sobertown, who are you? When you stand alone in this world and you shut out all the noise, who are you? Have you thought about this?

We at Sobertown who may have had histories with addiction very often hide secrets behind our smiles, behind our glistening eyes, behind our humor, behind our drive and success. We often hide secrets. We are often hiding thoughts of unworthiness, thoughts of being small. We hide thoughts of worthlessness well covered by external displays of courage and achievements and all the while we feel like an imposter. Don’t worry Sobertown if you have harbored these thoughts you would not be unique, you would not be alone. Some of us though hide thoughts of narcissism, of judgement and of disturbed patterns of thinking again masked effectively from the outside world through careful masking and reversal of internal dialogue to external expression and vocalisation. Again you are not alone.

Who we believe we are will shape us, who we believe we are will mold us, who we believe we are will drive our behavior.

You have a box in your brain, do you see it?

Close your eyes. Look within your own mind. There is a chest made of beautiful weathered timber sitting right there, it sits right between your ears, close your eyes, do you see it? The chest has perfectly crafted metal banding wrapping around the body to hold it strong and tight and sturdy hinges like a treasure chest, it has a big latch at the front which is locked with a huge rusty old lock. Nobody has opened this box since you were young and it was filled to the brim with who you are. Close your eyes, do you see your beautiful wooden chest? walk around it in your mind, it’s right there, it’s sitting in your brain, it’s right there in your skull behind your eyes and between your ears, it’s you, it’s yours. Look at it from the front, look at it from the back, rotate it around like it sits on a lazy Susan. Now send the chest back into storage, whisk it away back into the neurons deeper within your brain. Next picture a big beautiful skeleton key, it hangs in the air, levitating, slowly rotating and somehow it has a glow behind it, see it, it sits right behind your eyes. Close your eyes and see the skeleton key hanging there, reach out and take the key, this is yours, nobody else’s, not one person other than you in this entire universe can take this key from you, it’s not possible this is yours ad yours alone. Now bring back your box, bring the wooden chest back from the depths, back to the space between your ears. Reach out and place your key in the big lock, the key will turn cleanly and smoothly and the lock springs open. Take the lock off the latch and put it down. Now you have access to your brain box.

What’s in there? What secrets lie in your wooden chest? Is there fear? Is there regret? Is there self loathing? Is there an attachment to alcohol and to artificial escapism? That’s ok, whatever lies within your box is yours and yours alone but now you have access to it we need to clear it out. Pull everything out of the chest, just clear it out, throw it all on the floor

Who are you really. Because the fear, the regret, the anxiety and the attachment to alcohol is not you. The fear does not serve you, that’s not you, you just haven’t let it go yet because it has been locked up so tight within your mind for so long. Let it go, clear it out.

Who are you? What defines you?

Are you Strong?

Are you Sober?

Are you Fit?

Are you Focused?

Are you Stunning?

Are you Intelligent?

Are you Calm are you Kind?

Are you Funny are you Quick?

Clear out your brain box and set the attachments to the feelings that hurt you in the bin, send them away, clear them out.

Decide who you really are, you might be strong, you might be loving, you might be kind, you might be productive, you might be beautiful.

Decide who you really are PUT THESE IN YOUR BRAIN BOX AND LOCK IT BACK UP, then put that key right back where you found it where only you can access it.

When we set our beliefs as to who we really are then this is who we really are and our thoughts and actions will follow.

Don’t tell me you aren’t beautiful just because you don’t truly believe it because when you hold in your mind the view of yourself as ugly, fat, inadequate or not enough or even just average you will only ever see yourself in this light.

Beauty is as subjective as anything else in this world and the act of kindness and positivity is something any person can exhibit by choosing to do so, nobody is holding you back from change but you.

When you place “I am Strong” in your brain box, even if you do not feel it or believe it whole heartedly yet, this is you, this is your base and you will become this. When you have a tough day or week and feel weak you can acknowledge you feel weak but you know your true set point is one of strength, you can reach in deep, bring the brain box back to your mind and recall what you truly are, you are strong.

When you place “I am Sober” in your brain box, this is what you are. Even if you have a slip up and you drink you can bring back your brain box and you know inside that box is a fact, that fact is that you do not drink and the incongruence between your belief and action will help you return to who you truly are, a non drinker.

When you place “I am Focused” in your brain box, this is what you are and when you find yourself wasting time in ways you know you would prefer not to you will bring back your box and know, you are focused and you can reset, returning back to your path sooner.

Your brain box may be full of fixed mindset beliefs of yourself, they don’t have to remain.

Sobertown, as with all of my tools, this is one of many strategies we can employ to add to our sobriety and to contribute to our growth. This is a tool of visialisation. As with all of my tools, this is not magic this is another of many strategies to better ourselves and to stay our path.

Last week I was ill. I had a virus. I was lethargic, I was sick. I tried to exercise, I couldn’t muster more than a walk. I tried to be positive, I felt depressed and down. I tried to be productive, my fatigue was slowing any progress. I felt shit, I reached for my brain box, I brought it forward into view, I recalled its contents “I am Strong and Sober, I am Fit and Focused”. I then remembered and I knew, this is ok, I am strong, I am fit, I am focused and just because I feel down right now does not mean this will be how I feel forever, I will return to who I know I truly am as soon as my environment allows.

If you think you have to have an attachment to alcohol just because of your past. You are wrong.

Think you can’t grow. Bullshit.

Think you can’t love yourself. Bullshit.

Think you can’t love your body as it is. Bullshit.

Think you can’t be kind to other people. Bullshit.

Think you don’t belong. Bullshit.

Think you need approval from others to validate who you are. Bullshit.

Think you can’t learn and master new things. Bullshit.

You can do all of this and more and the starting point is knowing this, this is all you, this life you live internally can be shifted and shaped like real life magic, you can create new pathways, you can discard the limiting beliefs and you can love yourself. At risk of sounding wacky, sobriety and recovery can allow you love yourself if you let it, if you accept it and if you rebuild your brain box to be full of growth and supportive beliefs.

Sobertown, you can build your own world within your mind, you can shape your internal neurological future, you can manufacture magic within your own mind with time and work.

Alcohol is not a reward.

Alcohol is not a needed.

We have all been lied to about alcohol and you seeing the truth gives you a huge advantage in this short life, an ability to reach heights many will not, to spend out time in this world engaged, to love, to be kind, to shine a light where there was once darkness within. We are truly the lucky ones.

You have never been alone and you are the architect of your future mind.

A quote from William Wordsworth.

Your mind is the garden
Your thoughts are the seeds
The harvest can either be flowers
Or weeds.

Dr. Todd Crafter

AHPRA Reg Chiro/FA Reg Trainer

BAppSc(human movement), BHSc(chiro), MClinChiro

To contact the author please email soberaustralia@gmail.com

The Sobertown Blog articles and recordings are created as a means of assisting others in achieving and maintaining sobriety and freedom from alcohol. Experiences, entries, research and article content are that of the author and should be applied in a safe manner deemed best by the reader and applied safely, if relevant, with medical oversight. This is not medical advice and the author is not a medical doctor. No advice within is based on or crosses over with the authors profession or professional opinion as an AHPRA registered allied health practitioner or FA registered exercise professional.